A Month of Journal Tags: Day 2, If I could gain clarity about (Blank), then I would…

This will be a tough topic to tackle. I have so many questions, most of which don’t/can’t have definite answers right now. I’ll do my best to face the most difficult ones head-on, without judgment or anxiety.

Mindfulness is rarely a comfortable journey. THAT’s for sure.

If I could gain clarity about polygamy I would be able to look at different people who practiced it more gently.

Polygamy has never been a social concept I’ve handled well. Even imagining someone marrying a different spouse after their previous one has died gives me terrible anxiety. Movies like Sleepless in Seattle are most assuredly not my favorite in the world.

Over and over again I’ve gone over the issue in my mind, looking at it from a logical point of view and studying it out until I thought my heart would break. Intellectually, I can understand why God asked certain people to practice it. Emotionally, I fight it and outright reject it.

Even the thought of being caught in that kind of relationship is overwhelming.

The moment I can receive clarity about it is the moment I know I’ll be able to let go of prejudices I can’t seem to shake off against those who do choose it.

If I could have clarity about why I’m still single I would be able to better handle harder problems that will come in the future.

The fact I’m still single has been a burden from the time I was 18 years old. It comes with a plethora of old, scarring questions. “What is wrong with me?”, “Did I make a mistake in the past that has kept me from finding someone?”, “What is it I lack?”, “Will I end up an old maid?”, “Am I destined to be that one person in the family that never finds someone?” etc… (The list could go on, but you get the idea.)

I think the only thing that could bring clarity concerning this question is finding the right person to marry, or discovering a deeper purpose in life.

I know full well I’m not just my relationships, career, hobbies, or thoughts. However, there are times when I feel so lonely watching friends and family find happiness in marriage, pregnancies, and child-rearing.

I could talk at length about this subject, but I don’t like to dwell on it too long. It is painful to ponder, and I want to find happiness where I am now, despite not receiving answers to the longings of my heart.

When I reach a point in the future I can answer this question, I’ll be sure to write about it. I know there are more people out there like me who are lonely and wondering why love and marriage haven’t happened for them either.

If I could receive clarity concerning July 10, 2016, I would be able to put to rest the PTSD I’ve carried for five years.

I can’t go into detail about this particular topic because of its overall nature. However, there have been many times I’ve wondered if my experience was the way I thought. Sometimes I think I might have imagined something so profound could have happened at all.

For now, I choose to believe what I saw and experienced was real and I have the power to combat evil in my life.

Whatever questions I may have, or YOU may have as you read this, clarity comes as a gift to all in time. Perhaps in the near future, I can answer these issues I addressed in this post. Without fear, pain, or confusion.

Good luck to all and thank you for reading! If you like you can use this journal prompt for your own writing.

Come Follow Me: Jan 26 – Feb 1

Photo I took in Provo, UT

This week in studying for Come Follow Me I had so much on my mind concerning my future. Sometimes even when we find a direction there is still shadows of doubt and uncertainty which come. I also have thought so much about entertainment value and the media’s powerful influence in my life.

Throughout this week there were several principles which stuck out to me.

I. If we keep the commandments, God will nourish us, strengthen us and provide means to follow those commandments

Artist depiction of Bilbo Baggins,

I have begun to see all of God’s commandments as an invitation. But it is the kind of invitation which brings about change, oftentimes through much trial and sorrow. Take for example Bilbo Baggins from The Hobbit. Concerning this infamous character, Dieter F. Uchdorf commented in last General Conference,

However, when Bilbo is presented with the prospect of a grand adventure, something surges deep within his heart. He understands from the outset that the journey will be challenging. Even dangerous. There is even a possibility he might not return.

And yet, the call to adventure has reached deep into his heart. And so, this unremarkable hobbit leaves comfort behind and enters the path to a great adventure that will take him all the way to “there and back again.”²

-Dieter F. Uchdorf, “Your Grand Adventure” October 2019

Curiously enough, Bilbo could have chosen to stay home, enjoy life’s comforts and not have to face the sorrows and death threatening experiences ahead of him. But he does leave. And he was never the same.

He wasn’t the same because he had seen the world, that it was wide, beautiful and full of promising experiences and precious knowledge. He made meaningful relationships with great elves, dwarves and people. He conquered evil and faced temptation and overcame its deception. He also grieved at the death of his friends.

Though he faced so much, Bilbo changed and was grateful for it. Life is simple Hobbiton never seemed the same because of everything he had witnessed and experienced.

The same could be said of Lehi and his family. He and Nephi could have done a lot of good in Jerusalem, yet the Lord called them another way to raise up a righteous people.

What do these stores have to do with us? I’d same EVERYTHING. Just like Bilbo and Lehi’s family we accept the invitation to follow Christ. This takes courage, but when we follow Christ we gain the greatest, kindest, and most loving care taker we can ever have. He gives us trials and asks us to leave the comforts of an easy life, but never without the promise he will “prepare a way for (us) to accomplish the thing which he commandeth (us).” (1 Nephi 3:7)

Lehi said in 2 Nephi 1:15. “The Lord hath redeemed my soul from hell: I have beheld his glory, and I am encircled about eternally in the arms of his love.’ It is the same for all of us who have chosen the path of discipleship. We don’t just face hardship. We find God and come to know of his love for us. And THAT is worth any trial we could ever face in this life.

II. The difference between righteous and unrighteous dominion

Depiction of 1 Nephi 18

When I watched the video showing Lehi and his family crossing the ocean I paid special attention to Nephi and his older brothers. In this story, Nephi sees his brothers being disrespectful and rude towards God. The moment he goes to them to ask them to stop, they tie him to the mast in terrible anger.

At the head of this terrible misfortune was Lamen, the eldest son. There are several things Lamen can’t overcome. First, how he had to leave behind their land and inheritance. Staying in Jerusalem would have provided Lamen a rich life as the eldest son. Even after reaching the Promised land he couldn’t let it go. He also couldn’t shake the feeling Nephi wanted to become ruler over them.

In tying Nephi to the mast, Lamen established unrighteous dominion over his family. In his anger, pride and foolishness he cut his whole family off from the Lord’s influence. A storm came and threatened them. Yet for over three days Lamen, followed by Lemuel and the sons of Ishmael, kept their families in the midst of a tempest. They caused so much suffering but couldn’t see beyond their pride.

Lehi, the patriarch of the family couldn’t sway them. Nephi’s wife and children’s tears couldn’t change them. It wasn’t until “they could see the judgments of God were upon them, and that they must perish save that they should repent” that they freed Nephi.

In his exhaustion, Nephi prayed to God and led his family from their impending destruction. I would say this destruction was both physical and spiritual. This example shows very profoundly what happens when men in anger and pride rule over others. They become past feeling and will sacrifice almost anything to be right.

In contrast, Nephi did not give in to anger, but humbled himself before God, steering, with God’s help, his family away from danger. When faced with trial he chose faith over fear. He chose to seek knowledge, to look forward and to honor his parents. He became a righteous leader out of example, not because of misplaced ambition.

What intrigues me is this idea. Lamen could have been like Nephi. He was faced with the same tests, saw an angel, heard his father’s visions and had access to the scriptures. But when faced with trial he couldn’t see beyond a future he had left behind. This does not make him evil. It makes him obstinate and because of his pride an influence of harmful behaviors.

III. The things of greatest value we must hold onto with faith

Art by Walter Rane

One of the strongest messages from this reading concerned how I stand fast in the truths I know. Be cautious of giving your heart or time to sources which lead you very subtly away from God and the light of his gospel.

This becomes increasingly hard as the world shifts farther and farther away from God and his gospel truths. Sometimes it feels easier to give n or even pretend we don’t see the wrong around us.

But giving in does not change the infinite, eternal value of our knowledge of Jesus Christ and God’s plan of happiness. We can’t find enlightenment in accepting easy answers of the day. Uchdorf also said,

The third thing we strive to master in this journey is to take upon ourselves the name of Jesus Christ and not be ashamed of being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ.

We do not hide our faith.

We do not bury it.

To the contrary, we talk about our journey with others in normal and natural ways. That’s what friends do—they talk about things that are important to them. Things that are close to their heart and make a difference to them.

. . . Sometimes your stories make people laugh. Sometimes they bring them to tears. Sometimes they will help people to continue in patience, resilience, and courage to face another hour, another day and come a little closer to God.

-Dieter F. Uchdorf, “Your Great Adventure”, October 2019

My favorite scriptures from this week is in 1 Nephi 19.

7 For the things which some men esteem to be of great worth, both to the body and soul, others set at ^anaught and trample under their feet. Yea, even the very God of Israel do men ^btrample under their feet; I say, trample under their feet but I would speak in other words—they set him at naught, and ^chearken not to the voice of his counsels.

8 And behold he ^acometh, according to the words of the angel, in ^bsix hundred years from the time my father left Jerusalem.

9 And the world, because of their iniquity, shall judge him to be a thing of naught; wherefore they scourge him, and he suffereth it; and they smite him, and he suffereth it. Yea, they ^aspit upon him, and he suffereth it, because of his loving ^bkindness and his ^clong-suffering towards the children of men.

– 1 Nephi 19:8-9. The Book of Mormon

Though sometimes it feels like we are drowning in a sea of knowledge, music, noise and facts, we still have the gift of the Holy Ghost. We can, if we look and hear beyond all these things, feel God’s love. My life goal is not to let toxic ideas shift my focus from what I know is right. I pray to remember Christ, that he did all “because of his loving kindness and his long-suffering towards the children of men.” (1 Nephi 19:9)

Fear verses faith: Day 11

Do you remember the moments you were truly afraid? I think about it sometimes. My mother called me a crystal child. Things very easily upset or frightened me.The list of these things piled up for my young tender self. I feared going outside in the dark, zombies, dinosaurs and cloaked wraiths: things which were big, uncontrollable which could engulf me and take me away. I am not sure I’ve changed so much since I have grown older. I no longer fear those old movies or silent terrors but there are times when I feel myself stop, tremble and cover my head because of fear.

I thought of it today as I did yoga at my studio. I was already out of sorts so as I went through the usual postures and movements, it didn’t take long for me to start comparing myself to others who were more. . . “accomplished” then myself. The teacher called for a lot of handstands. I did not do a single one. I realized I had a problem when she demonstrated a wide legged handstand by the wall. To do the position I would need to pace my hands about half a foot from the wall, set my head firmly on the wall itself and with my legs wide kick up into the inversion.
I went by the wall, positioned myself and before I even attempted the jump I simply knelt down. I watched other students go in and out of it. It was in that moment I knew I was afraid. It didn’t just manifest itself there, it progressed throughout the whole session and by the end of it I was close to tears.
I know it wasn’t about the difficult postures. It was the jump, into the unknown. This jump and seeing others succeed froze me. I could literally picture all my life failures and I decided instead of taking the risk to give up and not try.
Perhaps that is what I needed from yoga today; to see my physical self so I can understand my mental self. Funny thing is, they are one and the same.
I have always been afraid of making mistakes. The examples are countless and the results are the same. That is, unless you look at those times where I didn’t give in to the fear, but fought through it. How else could I have moved to Idaho, finish college, become a teacher with no prior experience or even learn Russian?
In my last post not too long ago I didn’t know where I was going. Now I do. So why am I so afraid?
Thinking on it, I am faced with my same self from my mission who had feelings she did not want to admit and who was moving from a traumatic experience in a previous area. It was then that I had a dream. I share this dream because I feel someone needs to read it. It is a very special, sacred experience for me.

In my dream, I and another girl were being chased by someone, who I knew wished the worst for us. Eventually, he caught up to us in a room, where we had nowhere else to run. He looked at us, a well-dressed red haired man, and like a charismatic snake-oil salesman stated he would give us anything we ever wanted. All we needed to do was give our full selves to him. Our agency and will so to say. The other girl seemed as though she would give in to his offer. I couldn’t believe she would do such a thing.
I listened to him and knew I would never accept his offer, so instead of answering I asked him questions: What would happen to us if we agreed? Would we ever gain control of ourselves again? Each time I did this he grew angrier. Shimmers of a darker being would flicker like black shoots from him. Finally, he looked at me and said, “Why don’t we pray? You pray don’t you? Why don’t you say it, since you are so confident of yourself.”
So I started to pray, he grew closer and closer to me almost skin to skin, mocking everything I said. I was afraid. Terribly afraid. But instead of praying in English I began instead to speak in Russian. The more I focused my heart and words the angrier this being became, but I also gained more confidence.
Finally I looked at this dark, angry man and said, “We belong to Christ and you have no power over us.” That was when the facade was gone and we could finally escape. He lost his form, revealing himself for the twisted nightmare he was and I and the girl ran. We ran far and hard, always knowing he was not far behind us.
Before I knew it, I no longer was an adult, but a child. I ran along my old hallway from our old house in St. Johns to my parents room. My father and mother were in the bed and the room was chaotic, cluttered and I felt disoriented. I looked up at my father, terrified and said, “Dad, I need help.”
He looked at me and asked what was wrong. I told him, “Someone is coming, you can’t imagine how horrible! What do I do?”
Calmly, even as I could hear the nightmare coming my father told me, “Faith and fear cannot reside in the same heart together. Do you believe?”
It was then I woke up.
I’ve reflected many, many times on this dream and told a few select people of my experience. I write about it now so as to voice the battle I and every person must fight. This is a battle to face our fears with FAITH. But we need not face these fears alone. In Philipians 4:13 Paul stated, “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.”
The longer I live, the stronger my conviction that God is real. That Jesus Christ really did die and lives for us. Because these things are true means we have bigger, and grander things to look forward to in times to come.

It makes me think of a scene from The Prince of Egypt, where Moses talked to multiple Hebrews after turning through God’s power the river to blood.

Yes, Aaron, it’s true. Pharaoh has the power. He can take away your food, your home, your freedom. He can take away your sons and daughters. With one word, Pharaoh can take away your very lives. But there is one thing he cannot take away from you: your faith. Believe, for we will see God’s wonders.

As I face my own challenges, I hope I can find the courage and faith to continue moving forward. For those facing their own trials, I hope you and I can move forward with this faith. That we may believe in good things to come.

My Favorite Movies: 30-21

More and more animated films will leak onto my list. Just a heads up. 

  
30. Rebecca (1940)

This is one of the few times where I loved the movie more then the book. Based on French author Daphne du Maurier’s novel Rebecca, many critics and Hitchcock fans consider this film to be one of Alfred Hitchcock’s best. I have to agree with them. It is the way Hitchcock handled the material. He changed the ending and kept the main antagonist Rebecca hidden throughout. Not even a picture of the chilling beauty appeared. 
  

The tragedy of this story is the fate of the main character, the new Mrs. De Winter. Despite her love, there was the nagging omen Rebecca causing her to doubt her worth. By the end, it is too late to bring back her far away lost look and innocence. The love story takes a long time to unfold but by its end it feels so real. Not everything is what it’s seems but that is where the brilliance shines the better.  

Favorite Quote(s): 

1. Maxim de Winter: I can’t forget what it’s done to you. I’ve been thinking of nothing else since it happened. It’s gone forever, that funny young, lost look I loved won’t ever come back. I killed that when I told you about Rebecca. It’s gone. In a few hours, you’ve grown so much older.

2. Maxim de Winter: You thought I loved Rebecca? You thought that? I hated her!

3. Mrs. de Winter: [about her father] He had a theory that if you should find one perfect thing, or place or person, you should stick to it. Do you think that’s very silly? 

Maxim de Winter: No, I’m a firm believer in that myself.

 
29. Life of Pi (2012) 

This film is impossible to make without computer effects. Yet, it does not feel computer generated. The story is meant to make you believe in God. I think “make” is the wrong word. There is nothing in this world that can make one believe in God and stay true to Him. No, it does it into another way. But that is the personal journey. 
  

It is rare for a film to be so openly spiritual. Yet, I believe there is beauty hidden in it if only people will lift their eyes from the shield of doubt. It is obvious why I love this story so. To believe takes an open heart. And those  who go through such hard trials come out the stronger if they endure it well. I know to believe is not popular but when has popularity ever supported truth? 

Favorite Quote(s): 

1. Adult Pi Patel: So which story do you prefer? 

Writer: The one with the tiger. That’s the better story. 

Adult Pi Patel: Thank you. And so it goes with God. 

2. Santosh Patel: We will sail like Columbus. 

Pi Patel: But Columbus was looking for India!

3. Adult Pi Patel: Faith is a house with many rooms. 

Writer: But no room for doubt? 

Adult Pi Patel: Oh plenty, on every floor. Doubt is useful, it keeps faith a living thing. After all, you cannot know the strength of your faith until it is tested.
  
28. Jesus of Nazareth (1977)

Technically this is a miniseries commissioned by the Roman Catholic Church. There were many big name actors and actresses throughout including Laurence Olivier and James Mason. But I did not know those famous people when I saw it as a child. This a powerful watch. Some may say it is a bloated push to force Christ at people. But again, this is a situation where the message and beauty is there if people are willing to see it. 
  

Though it is impossible to truly portray Christ, because only imperfect people can play him, there is power in revisiting his life and ministry. My family and I watched this every Easter and it implanted deeply in me a spiritual perspective on the season. 

Favorite Quote(s):

1. Pontius Pilate: Do you realize I have the power to release you or have you crucified? 

Jesus Christ: You wouldn’t have had that power over me if it hadn’t been given to you from above.

  
27. Song of the Sea (2014)

Though I also like Secret of Kells, the beauty and innocence of this film struck me hard the first time I saw it. There is no antagonist nor any impressing doom. What permeates, is this sad feeling that old things are passing away. I have always had a strong love of old tales and cultures. Irish folktales have a particularly somber tone. Yet, there is reprise and happiness found at the film’s end. 
 

There is beauty in childhood innocence and true love. It is funny how alongside great sadness there is always found great happiness. Perhaps that is why I love this story. I watched a show once called Kino’s Journey (2003). The premis is “The world is not beautiful therefore it is beautiful.”. I think the same can be said about this movie. Bronagh must leave behind her husband and son for the sea. But there’s love still there. That is much makes the journey in this film so memorable. 

Favorite Quote(s):

1. Bronagh: My son, remember me in your stories and in your songs. Know that I will always love you, always. 

 26. Hotarubu no Mori E (2011)

Before I saw this movie, I saw a short video on YouTube dedicated to it. I wept. Then I saw the movie and cried again. It had been a long time since a story had touched me so. The story centers around a girl named Hotaru who meets a young man Gin who is trapped between life and death. He cannot touch her or else he will disappear from her world. 

 This film shows that love is not dependant on physical interaction. The fruit of love is companionship and friendship. It was hard to see two people growing together and loving yet separated by unimaginable forces. But there was more beauty and love shown in this obscure animated film then I have seen in a long time. Though I cried for their inevitable parting, something in me knew it was a wonderful thing. In The Return of the King (1955) Gandalf said, “I will not say do not weep, for not all tears are an evil.” In seeing this film, I believe him. 

Favorite Quote(s):

1. Hotaru: Gin, I thought of you during the winter. Even during autumn and spring. Gin, don’t forget about me.”

2. Hotaru: Time may separate us someday. But, even still, until then, let’s stay together. 

3. Gin: I can’t wait for summer to come around. When I’m away from you, even though I can’t be around crowds, I want to go see you.

4. Hotaru: I probably won’t be able to look forward to summer for a long time. My chest will hurt. My tears will be overflowing. But this warmth in my hands and these summer memories will live on in my heart. 

  
25. Coraline (2009)

I love creepy children’s films like this. I believe that is my German soul speaking to me. I think this is because I love to see evils like the other mother be defeated. The original novel written by Neil Gaiman painted a startling picture of a more modern day boogie man. It also shows that children are often more perceptive than adults to the evils that surround us. That is the tragedy of our age. The child is being driven out by our media and grown ups become all the more oblivious at an earlier age. 
  

The imagery is so colorful and out of all the still motion pictures made I think this is the most beautiful visually.  I also like how “not” childish this movie feels. It does not rely on corny jokes or dating references. It tells a story about temptation and finding that what we always wanted is more often sitting right in front of us. 

Favorite Quote(s): 

1. Coraline Jones: How can you walk away from something and then come towards it? 

Cat: Walk around the world. 

Coraline Jones: Small world.

2. Miss Forcible: [reading tea leaves] Well, not to worry, child: It’s good news. There’s a tall, handsome beast in your future. 

Coraline Jones: A what? 

Miss Spink: Miriam, really, you’re holding it wrong. See? Danger! 

Coraline Jones: What do you see? 

Miss Spink: I see a very peculiar hand. 

Miss Forcible: I see a giraffe. 

Miss Spink: Giraffes don’t just fall from the sky, Miriam. 

Coraline Jones: Well, what should I do? 

Miss Spink: Never wear green in your dressing room. 

Miss Forcible: Acquire a very tall step-ladder.
  
24. The Incredibles (2004)

Ahhhh I remember when this came out. This is yet another film I watched with my brother Spencer. The trailers made us laugh so hard! A sign of a great movie is one that makes you never forget the first time you saw it. There was something so human about this one. It is about a man stuck between a life he used to have as a superheroe and the daunting, dull life he thinks he has. 
  

One of the most powerful moments is when he hears his wife on the receiver at Syndrome’s lair and his family’s supposed death. There, he thinks he has lost everything he loves and unashamedly weeps. That was the time when he realized his family was the treasure he had been seeking all along. It is funny, cleverly written and a remarkable addition to the  super hero film genre. 

Favorite Quote(s):

1. Lucius: Honey? 

Honey: What? 

Lucius: Where’s my super suit? 

Honey: What? 

Lucius: Where – is – my – super – suit? 

Honey: I, uh, put it away. 

[helicopter explodes outside]

Lucius: *Where*? 

Honey: *Why* do you *need* to know? 

Lucius: I need it! 

[Lucius rummages through another room in his condo]

Honey: Uh-uh! Don’t you think about running off doing no daring-do. We’ve been planning this dinner for two months! 

Lucius: The public is in danger! 

Honey: My evening’s in danger! 

Lucius: You tell me where my suit is, woman! We are talking about the greater good! 

Honey: ‘Greater good?’ I am your wife! I’m the greatest *good* you are ever gonna get!

2. Bob: Weren’t you in the news? Some show in, Prayge… Prague? 

Edna: Milan, darling. Milan. Supermodels. Heh! Nothing super about them… spoiled, stupid little stick figures with poofy lips who think only about themselves. Feh! I used to design for *gods*!

3. [Bob is explaining an insurance policy loophole to a Mrs. Hogenson]

Bob: [whispering] Listen closely. I’d like to help you but I can’t. I’d like to tell you to take a copy of your policy to Norma Wilcox on… Norma Wilcox, W-I-L-C-O-X… on the third floor, but I can’t. 

[Mrs. Hogenson scribbles details of Bob’s loophole on a small notepad]

Bob: I also do not advise you to fill out and file a WS2475 form with our legal department on the second floor. I would not expect someone to get back to you quickly to resolve the matter. I’d like to help, but there’s nothing I can do.

4. Mr. Incredible: Wait here and stay hidden. I’m going in. 

Elastigirl: While what? I watch helplessly from the sidelines? I don’t think so. 

Mr. Incredible: I’m asking you to wait with the kids. 

Elastigirl: And I’m telling you, not a chance. You’re my husband, I’m with you – for better or worse. 

Mr. Incredible: I have to do this alone. 

Elastigirl: What is this to you? Playtime? 

Mr. Incredible: No. 

Elastigirl: So you can be Mr. Incredible again? 

Mr. Incredible: No! 

Elastigirl: Then what? What is it? 

Mr. Incredible: I’m not… 

Elastigirl: Not what? 

Mr. Incredible: Not… I’m not strong enough. 

Elastigirl: Strong enough? And this will make you stronger? 

Mr. Incredible: Yes. No! 

Elastigirl: That’s what this is? Some sort of work out? 

Mr. Incredible: [shouts] I can’t lose you again! [calms down]

Mr. Incredible: I can’t. Not again. I’m not s-strong enough. 

Elastigirl: [kisses him] If we work together, you won’t have to be. 

Mr. Incredible: I don’t know what will happen… 

Elastigirl: Hey, c’mon. We’re superheroes. What could happen?
  
23. Ratatouille (2006)

I did not like this movie as much the first watch. At the time, it never struck a chord with me. With further contemplation though, I came to love it. A movie about acceptance, companionship and family, it is told from the perspective of a rat Remi, who feels out of place with his family. 
  

I think I love it most for its end. Gusteau’s restaurant gets closed down, most of the workers abandon them and Anton Ego loses his place as France’s top food critic. All for believing in a rat. But where there is glitter there is gold. Remi, Linguini and Collette open a new restaurant, Ego visits often, a changed and happy man and Remy’s family finally embraces his talent. Sometimes what we need is not immediately apparent. More than not it is waiting behind a closed door. 

Favorite Quote: 

 [when the restaurant is empty Linguini and Colette bring Remy to meet Ego]

Remy: At first, Ego thinks it’s a joke. But as Linguini explains, Ego’s smile disappears. He doesn’t react beyond asking the occasional question. And when the story’s done, Ego stands, thanks us for the meal, and leaves, without another word. The following day, his review appears: 

Anton Ego: In many ways, the work of a critic is easy. We risk very little, yet enjoy a position over those who offer up their work and their selves to our judgment. We thrive on negative criticism, which is fun to write and to read. But the bitter truth we critics must face, is that in the grand scheme of things, the average piece of junk is probably more meaningful than our criticism designating it so. But there are times when a critic truly risks something, and that is in the discovery and defense of the *new*. The world is often unkind to new talent, new creations. The new needs friends. Last night, I experienced something new: an extraordinary meal from a singularly unexpected source. To say that both the meal and its maker have challenged my preconceptions about fine cooking is a gross understatement. They have rocked me to my core. In the past, I have made no secret of my disdain for Chef Gusteau’s famous motto, “Anyone can cook.” But I realize, only now do I truly understand what he meant. Not everyone can become a great artist; but a great artist *can* come from *anywhere*. It is difficult to imagine more humble origins than those of the genius now cooking at Gusteau’s, who is, in this critic’s opinion, nothing less than the finest chef in France. I will be returning to Gusteau’s soon, hungry for more.

  
22. Stairway to Heaven (1947)

A funny sort of story is attached to this film. The first time I saw it, I was sitting next to my younger brothers who were playing a computer game. I started the movie and gradually within the next five minutes they forgot the game and squeezed next to me to find out what happens. A war film on the surface, what it is really about is a man who challenges his fate to be with a woman he came to love. 
  

The man, Peter Carter, falls from a burning plane into the ocean after talking to June, one of the workers for the USAAF. He survives because his angel misses him in the London fog. Once he wakes up he meets June, whom he had never personally met, and they both recognize each other and fall in love. This is yet another powerful love story I adore for its genuinity. There is definitely more to this movie then initially meets the eye and it is a deep look into humanity’s perspective on death and the mind.

Favorite Quote(s): 

1. Peter: [over radio] Where were you born? 

June: Boston. 

Peter: Mass.? 

June: Yes. 

Peter: That’s a place to be born, history was made there. Are you in love with anybody? No, no don’t answer that. 

June: I could love a man like you, Peter. 

Peter: I love you, June. You’re life and I’m leaving you.

2. The Judge: Members of the jury, as Sir Walter Scott is always saying… In peace, Love tunes the shepherd’s reed; In war, he mounts the warrior’s steed; In halls, in gay attire is seen; In hamlets, dances on the green. Love rules the court, the camp, the grove, and men below, and saints above; For Love is heaven, and heaven is Love. Will you please consider your verdict.

3. Abraham Farlan: You claim you love her. 

Peter: I do love her! 

Abraham Farlan: Can you prove it? 

Peter: Well give me time, sir. Fifty years will do. 

Abraham Farlan: But can you prove it? 

Peter: Well, can a starving man prove he’s hungry except by eating? 

Abraham Farlan: Would you die for her? 

Peter: I would, but, er, I’d rather live.
  
21. Wizard of Oz (1939)

1939 was an incredible year for films. Classics like Mr. Smith Goes to Washington, Gone with the Wind, Goodbye, Mr. Chips, Stagecoach, The Hound of the Baskervilles and Love Affair are considered some of the greatest films ever done. My favorite however is The Wizard of Oz. The book really is not that memorable for me. It is this movie that established my dreams for adventure and magic. 
  

Timeless in its music, effects and acting I believe this is one of the few movies that is nearly perfect. This is not because there were no mistakes made here and there with the backgrounds or costume design. No, it is an enchanting, universal almost indescribable feeling that rests throughout it. Roger Ebert put it best in his review. 

The elements in “The Wizard of Oz” powerfully fill a void that exists inside many children. For kids of a certain age, home is everything, the center of the world. But over the rainbow, dimly guessed at, is the wide earth, fascinating and terrifying. There is a deep fundamental fear that events might conspire to transport the child from the safety of home and strand him far away in a strange land. And what would he hope to find there? Why, new friends, to advise and protect him. And Toto, of course, because children have such a strong symbiotic relationship with their pets that they assume they would get lost together.

. . . its underlying story penetrates straight to the deepest insecurities of childhood, stirs them and then reassures them. As adults, we love it because it reminds us of a journey we have taken.

That is also why The Heroes Journey works so well for us as people. It is the idea that when all the war and hardship is over there is a place we all can go to for peace. That is how I feel about this movie. It’s magic lies in its heart and it means the world to me. 

Favorite Quote(s): 

1.Scarecrow: First they [the Flying Monkeys] took my legs off and they threw them over there! Then they took my chest out and they threw it over there! 

Tin Woodsman: Well, that’s you all over!

2. Auntie Em Gale: Almira Gulch, just because you own half the county doesn’t mean that you have the power to run the rest of us. For twenty-three years, I’ve been dying to tell you what I thought of you! And now… well, being a Christian woman, I can’t say it!